Future.

Since I moved away from home in the summer of 2011, I've been having a really hard time adjusting to life. Adjusting to new places, new people and most of all, starting over all the time. I knew it was going to be difficult, but I never imagined it would be this difficult.

Christmas Joy.

But, I'm glad to report, that it's slowly getting easier. 

Yesterday I finished my first real internship at Post City Magazine. For three months, I was pulling double duty, working at the magazine in the morning then going to work at night. Besides being completely exhausted (so much so for the last week I kept sleeping through my work out alarm!), I actually started to grow more and more excited about the future. 

I've started feeling more confident about myself. Now I know what I am capable of, I feel more confident to head into the world and actually start developing my own career as a writer.

Over the past two weeks or so, I've been e-mailing a friend and former college editor about life. I always looked up to him because he is so talented and someone who's opinion a really trusted.  I asked him what I should do next, where should I go from here, how do I transition from this internship to life. And after a few e-mails, he pointed something out that made me have a light bulb moment. 

I'm having a hard time narrowing down a career because I just have too many ideas. 

At first I considered this a potentially bad thing. But over the past few days, I think I'm going to be okay. I like that I have many idea on what I want to do with my life. I like that I have so many options for my future, as long as I'm proactive with them. 

I'm going to spend the rest of my time here in Toronto participating in internships in different fields, working on narrowing down what I love to do. I'm going to build an sturdy portfolio, gain a lot of experience and go into my next move prepared for the future. 

I'm feeling really good about life right now. Maybe it's the sudden bank of free time. Maybe it's the Christmas mug I'm drinking coffee out of it. Maybe it's the less then two week countdown I have going for Christmas vacation. But maybe I am just, finally, finding myself.