While doing my usual and daily internet scouring (literally 8 hours of reading, hunting, searching, reading, repeat) I came across a slew of articles about cheating. A local Toronto paper posted an article on it's blog about cheating: how to stop your husband from cheating, if you should tell your best friend that their boyfriend/husband is cheating and now the third instalment, the anti-cheating ring.
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Just by reading this article I can see that this little series has been a big hit. People are very sensitive when dealing with the topics of marriage, cheating and monogamy. This article suggests the use of a ring with the engraving "I'm Married" on it. The idea is that when the man takes his ring off, as I guess it's popular for them to do, the fact that he's married will still be visible.
The question is: Would "I'm Married" really stop a man (or woman) from cheating on their spouse?
Survey says? Probs not, guys...probs not.
As for my opinion, I believe that if you cheat on your spouse (or boyfriend or girlfriend) you obviously don't want to be in that relationship. Cut and dry. There are many arguments out there that people get bored or need something to spice up their love life and I think the solution isn't in the bed of someone else. I think if you are having a problem you should talk to your hubby about it. Damaging the relationship and shattering trust isn't the way.
After getting my fill on crappy marriage-saving tips, another title caught my eye: Is cheating the answer to making a marriage last? Of course I had to read it!
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The general idea is that in some cases, having other partners can keep a marriage alive. There are some things mentioned in the article that I get too hot and bothered over to talk about without sounding preachy so you may just have to read it yourself. But I think that if you need a little love life revival, play at it. Secret, cheating and hurting isn't the answer.
What do you think about this issue? What is your view on cheating or an open relationship?
I think that cheating is an unfortunate result of many peoples' shortened attention spans and heightened hedonistic tendencies. Our culture is rapidly changing (in my opinion, most often in a declining direction) and along with it the ideals and expectations of the individuals within that culture.
ReplyDeleteI call us the "Sitcom Generation"- we expect everything to be presented, played out, and solved in an unrealistically short period of time (22 minutes all wrapped up in a tidy bow). In a world of fast food, IM's, and the idea that 'time is money' and 'money is time' we have developed an overactive lust (and appreciation) for instant gratification.
I feel this bleeds into many of our relationships. We grow bored too easily, we get annoyed too readily, and many arn't willing to put the effort and work into maintaining a healthy relationship. So when things go south instead of addressing the real issues they turn toward a hedonistically self serving purpose: cheating. Instant gratification with someone other than their partner; and in some cases instant validation, instant payback, or instant vindictiveness. And many find ways to twist their dishonesty around to justify it in their own minds, therefore alleviating guilt, remorse, or other such "icky" feelings. I have heard excuses such as "Well SHE cheated on ME first!" or "He ignores me so much, I was lonely." or "I needed somebody to make me feel ______". So very many excuses and flawed justifications. It's a sad sad world out there when people are so self serving and so far from self honesty.